Personalization used to be the golden ticket of email marketing.
Insert someone’s first name into a subject line, reference their city, or suggest products they might like, and suddenly engagement rates would climb.
Done right, it felt thoughtful, almost like a brand actually saw you.
But here’s the twist: when personalization goes too far—when it tips into invasive or unsettling—it stops feeling helpful and starts feeling creepy.
And with the rise of artificial intelligence powering more and more email campaigns, we’re entering an era where this line is easier than ever to cross.
So, what happens when AI turns personalization into over-personalization? And how do we avoid spooking the very people we’re trying to connect with?
The Allure of AI in Email Marketing
AI has transformed email marketing faster than most people realize. From generating subject lines to writing entire AI-generated sales emails: in seconds, artificial intelligence is helping brands produce content at scale.
It’s efficient, cost-effective, and often shockingly accurate. Tools like Jasper, Copy.ai, and Phrasee promise smarter outreach by predicting what phrases and tones will resonate with different audiences.
And because AI can run endless A/B testing with variations, it’s constantly optimizing toward what performs best.
Sounds great, right? But the trouble starts when “personalized” slides into “intrusive.”
When Personalization Crosses the Line
Let’s imagine a scenario. You open your inbox and see a subject line that says:
“Hey [Your Name], still thinking about that navy sweater you clicked on at 9:42 p.m. last Thursday?”
Some people might find that clever. Others might feel like they’re being digitally stalked.
That’s the tightrope AI is walking right now. Its access to behavioral data means it can craft hyper-specific messages.
But too much detail can make recipients uneasy. According to a Pew Research study, 79% of Americans are concerned about how companies use their personal data.
So while personalization can boost engagement, it can also backfire if it feels invasive.
The Psychology of “Creepiness”
Why does this happen? It’s not just about data. It’s about perception.
Humans are wired to respond to signals of care and attention. If a barista remembers your order, it feels nice.
But if that barista also mentions what you were doing last Saturday night, you’d be unsettled.
The same applies to email. People expect brands to know their name and maybe their preferences.
But when AI starts referencing things like exact browsing times, private interests, or cross-device activity, it feels like surveillance, not service.
That uncanny feeling—the sense that a machine knows more than it should—is at the heart of the problem.
Can AI Copywriting Keep It Human?
This is where the debate gets interesting. Can AI copywriting actually strike the right balance?
In theory, yes. AI can be trained to avoid overly invasive details, sticking to broader personalization like categories of interest instead of exact behaviors.
But in practice, many marketers are tempted to push the limits, chasing higher open and click-through rates.
And here’s my personal take: when you optimize purely for metrics, you risk losing sight of the human being behind the inbox.
Numbers don’t capture discomfort. Open rates can’t tell you when someone unsubscribed because they felt creeped out.
This is why AI needs guardrails. Left unchecked, it will always push toward whatever gets the most engagement—even if that means crossing ethical lines.
The Controversy: Should We Disclose AI-Written Emails?
That brings us to the controversy: should companies tell recipients when emails are AI-written?
On one side, transparency builds trust. People may appreciate knowing when a message was machine-generated. On the other, disclosing it might break the illusion of personal connection.
It’s a tricky balance. The Federal Trade Commission has already hinted at the need for clearer guidelines around AI in marketing.
And as regulation evolves, we may not have the luxury of keeping this invisible.
Personally, I think honesty wins in the long run. If a brand told me, “This message was drafted with the help of AI,” I’d actually be more likely to trust them—not less.
Real-World Backlash
This isn’t just theory. Brands have already stumbled.
In 2022, a retail company rolled out a new AI-driven personalization tool. Customers began receiving emails referencing products they had only viewed once, late at night, on their phone.
Many felt uncomfortable and complained publicly on social media. The company’s attempt at “thoughtful personalization” ended up damaging its reputation.
And it’s not just retail. In financial services, where privacy expectations are even higher, hyper-personalized AI emails have raised red flags with regulators.
The lesson? Just because AI can personalize doesn’t mean it should.
Metrics Don’t Tell the Whole Story
Here’s where marketers often get trapped. AI reports back hard numbers: open rates, click-through rates, conversions. If the metrics are trending upward, the campaign looks like a success.
But what those dashboards don’t show is the silent erosion of trust. People who don’t complain might still unsubscribe, or worse, quietly disengage with your brand altogether.
And once someone feels a company has overstepped their boundaries, rebuilding that relationship is incredibly difficult.
This is the long game AI can’t see—and humans must.
A Human Touch in the Machine Age
So how do we fix this? My view is simple: personalization should feel like hospitality, not surveillance.
- It’s fine to remember my name.
- It’s fine to recommend products I’ve shown interest in.
- But it’s not fine to make me feel like you’re monitoring my private behavior.
The solution lies in restraint. AI should be a tool for relevance, not intrusion. And marketers should blend AI insights with human judgment, asking, “Would this feel natural if I said it face-to-face?”
Where AI Helps Without Crossing the Line
It’s worth noting that AI isn’t inherently creepy. It can be a tremendous asset when used responsibly.
- Segmentation: Grouping audiences by general interests rather than hyper-specific behaviors.
- Tone optimization: Testing whether a friendly or formal voice resonates better with different demographics.
- Content variety: Offering fresh, engaging copy without repetitive phrasing.
These uses make emails more engaging without making people feel spied on.
The Role of A/B Testing
One of AI’s biggest strengths is rapid testing. Through A/B testing with different subject lines, tones, and calls-to-action, AI can help identify what works best for engagement.
But here’s the nuance: success shouldn’t be measured only by open rates. Long-term trust and brand sentiment matter too.
Which means companies need to expand what they’re testing—not just clicks, but comfort. Not just opens, but loyalty.
My Final Take
AI in email marketing is powerful, and personalization is one of its sharpest tools. But power without restraint can be dangerous.
When AI turns personalization into something invasive, brands risk alienating the very people they’re trying to attract.
So, how do we balance it? By remembering that data points are people. By resisting the urge to over-optimize. By keeping empathy at the center of every campaign.
Because while AI can draft faster, analyze better, and scale infinitely, it still can’t answer the simplest but most important question: Would I feel comfortable receiving this email?
And maybe that’s the guiding principle marketers need most.
